Emma is currently...

  • Addicted to: Fruit and nut mix
  • Listening to: Band of Joy - Robert Plant
  • Reading: Naples '44 - Norman Lewis

Tuesday 11 May 2010

The many ways to avoid revision.

It's really amazing, the things you can find to occupy yourself with when you have lots and lots of revision to do. These things include:

  • Going out to M&S to buy 'revision fuel'. Returning with half the store. Inviting people around to eat all the food you have bought, since it is far too much for one person.
  • Going out for a 'quick coffee' with a friend. Returning with shimmery hairspray, tanning moisturiser, bathroom cleaning products and 24 felt tip pens in various colours (why?).
  • Watching an awful movie called 'Ninja Assassin' which involves every Chinese/Japanese stereotype you can possibly think of, all rolled together with some awful scriptwriting and industrial amounts of red poster paint ("blood").
  • Actually talking to your parents.
  • Actually doing the washing up.
  • Bouncing on your bed with your housemates and attempting to take photos of yourself striking poses mid-air.
  • Baking a GIANT cake that is the exact same size, and decorated exactly the same, as your Romanticism anthology. This included painting on the front cover in food colouring, and took us about 3 and a half hours. Our justification was that it was for a friend's birthday. We didn't even get to eat it though, because when we took it to our friend's party in a local bar, they didn't have any knives to cut it with. "We're not allowed to keep knives behind the bar," the girl told us. "If you want to bring your own in though, that's fine." You what?
  • Taking up running. Yes, I have become a runner. My first run was a bit of a fail: I went out and returned home an hour later sweaty and exhausted, having pulled every muscle in my body, wearing no shoes and socks covered in blood. No, I didn't get my shoes torn viciously from my feet by a pack of enraged foxes. The shoes cut into my feet, so that I had to take them off and limp home. I also think I swallowed several flies. However, I went out and purchased a pair of disturbingly expensive Nike running shoes, which means that I now have to go running to offset the cost.
  • Designing an elaborate door sign with my name on it, in swirly letters with chalk pastels and gold leaf, then deciding after two hours that it's rubbish and throwing it away.
  • Fake tanning. It can take a surprising amount of time.
  • Shoe shopping. Enough said.
This is all I can think of for now. However, I'm sure over the next few days I will discover many new forms of procrastination, so I'll be sure to fill you in.

Might I add that revision is killing me? At least with an essay you have a word count to work towards, and once you've hit it and polished your essay to a good standard you can relax. With revision there is always more you can do. And it's not even interesting, because it's stuff you have learnt already and just forgot. I love Great Expectations but reading it for the third time, Mr Dickens' jokes are starting to get a little tired.

I think my cat has noticed my distress, and this morning tried to console me by bringing me a dead bird and sneezing its feathers all over the dining room. It was not appreciated.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Here's a friendly tip: too much procrastination can lead to regrets. Trust me. But this post was funny tho. You got me laughing :D

Emma said...

Thanks for the tip - I've stopped procrastinating and am getting on with it now! Still, I'm glad to have amused you.